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THE OTHER DISCIPLE OUTRAN PETER John 20:4

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THE OTHER DISCIPLE OUTRAN PETER John 20:4

12 minuten leestijd Arcering uitzetten

Part II

God converts people, not characters or natures. Although they receive a blow, yet they are not converted. Formerly, in his natural state, Peter must have been that way too, and now that same character was also manifested in the life of grace. Yet it was not only his character. At times it was also, “The love of Christ constraineth us.” Some people think before they speak, but that was not so with Peter. He always acted as spokesman. But now it is different. So much had taken place within his soul on that Friday morning. His soul was consumed with sorrow, and his heart was pierced with the arrows of Satan. Was there ever among God’s children and servants one that had a sorrow like Peter’s?

No, he did not put the blame upon another. His sins lay as heavy as lead upon his soul. And now Christ has died; there is now no way to beg for forgiveness, to make a confession before Him, to fall at those blessed feet of Christ. Ah, if there was only an opportunity to do it, but it was so dark from all sides. And then everything, everything comes back, having been warned so kindly and earnestly and … “Would that I had risked my life for Him, that Christ, Who has always surrounded me with so much love.”

When God converts a person by His Spirit, then the Lord sets our sins in order before our eyes. Our life returns. But after grace has been received, and we have sinned in another way against love, that is much more grievous. Then everything that God has done for our soul begins to testify against us. And then?

Yea, God’s true people never forgive themselves their sins. It is true, Peter had wept and mourned over his sins, but although tears give proof of guilt, yet they cannot wipe out our guilt.

The reason why Peter did not run so fast, not as fast as John, was not because John was much younger than Peter. O no, although that was true, yet Peter was also still in the prime of life. There were altogether different reasons. It was not for outward reasons, sickness or weakness that he remained behind John, but it was the burden of his guilt and sin which oppressed him. Inwardly, he was so sad and ashamed.

But Peter had broken his legs. His denial weighed so heavy upon his soul. No doubt, within they must have said, “Dare you still come to that grave? No doubt, there shall be a message from heaven to tell you: Just return, you unfaithful denier. You have sinned away all grace, and made yourself unworthy of your office. God will have nothing more to do with you. And if Christ is now really risen, then you shall hear an Anathema out of His mouth. Although He has looked upon you in the hall of the High Priest, now He shall bid you farewell forever.”

Ah, yes friends, it cannot be described how tempestuous it must have been in his heart. That is only known to them who have experienced such matters.

Although there are no special sins in our life, the murderer is behind us from day to day, and regarding our daily offences (James 3:2) and depraved nature, how those poor people are constantly plagued and persecuted; but especially in a case like this with Peter.

Yet there is something attractive and loveable in it. It was a deep way for Peter, but on the other hand, it was profitable for his soul.

How clearly we can see in his conduct, that the true humility of heart was present which had been wrought by the Holy Spirit.

Being ashamed of his sin, and sorrowful because he had so abominably and scornfully offended God and had sinned against the love of Christ and against his colleagues, he did not run along so fast. With Peter it became manifest in the fruit that it was not only his conscience, but that it was clearly a work of the heart. God had made his heart soft, and the Lord had humbled him.

And that is something which we have not of ourselves. We must first be made a sinner before God, by God Himself. Also, after a deep fall we must be brought to true repentance which we cannot do by ourselves. The desire of the humbled heart is to bow down before God as David sang in Psalter No. 348:

“Let us go up to God’s own house
And bow before Him there.”

How much God loved Peter, and what a tender care of Christ was over him. By and by, he would hear it from the women that Christ had not rejected him, but that His affections went out to him.

After only an hour in that morning, Christ would personally seek Peter and receive him again as a child.

John ran faster than Peter. Peter followed. What a great grace had been granted to him. It was a deep way for Peter himself, but yet so profitable. No doubt he remembered with guilt and sorrow that he had not listened to the serious admonition of his Master, but also that he had placed himself above the other disciples. He had learned more in those three days than in all those three years, that he had been favored to follow Christ. Truly, we should become jealous of that!

It is God’s own work to arrest a sinner and to stop him on the way to perdition, since by nature he hastens with rapid strides to eternal ruin. It is God’s own work to bring us from the broad way of destruction and to cause us to enter in at the strait gate that we may set our feet upon the narrow way of life, upon that way where the wayfaring men, though fools, shall not err, upon that way which is above to the wise.

But it is also a great mercy when we may follow. By nature, we want to walk before, but God must teach us to follow. To remain behind, as in the case of Peter, although it is contrary to flesh and blood, yet the Lord can open ways for us so that we will walk behind.

The entire life of a child of God is only a training school. More and more lessons must be learned which are so very humiliating to our nature, but by which our soul prospers, and for which we shall later thank the Lord.

In nature there is a great difference between a frog and a snail. A frog does nothing but jump; he jumps over everything, but a snail crawls. When we pay attention to such a snail, then it is difficult for us to see that the snail is progressing, but he does get ahead, and then wherever that snail has crawled, he leaves a silver line.

Thus, no doubt, it must also have been with Peter. His soul was no doubt like a watered garden.

It has also been within his heart:

“For my transgression I confess,
I ever see my sin.
Against Thee only have I sinned,
Done evil in Thy sight,
Lord, in Thy judgment Thou art just
And in Thy sentence right.”

But oh, although he did not run as fast and rapid as John, yet he was on the way to Christ, on the way to confess his sins, on the way to receive pardon and grace, on the way to partake again of communion with Christ.

There is no apostacy of saints. God maintains His own work. Those people seek to know God as their God. A longing after Christ has been wrought within their heart by the Holy Spirit. They want to live where Christ is. Where the carcass is, there the eagles are gathered together.

That which God has placed in the heart of His people, neither sin, devil or world can ever remove. Neither was there here anything of Peter but that which we read of Israel in Hosea 11:4, “I drew them (it was a one-sided work of God) with cords of a man, with bands of love, and I was to them as they that take off the yoke on their jaw, and I laid meat unto them.” If the Lord had never held on to Peter in his sorrow, he had fainted. If the Lord Himself had not drawn him, then he would have never come out again, and if the Lord Himself had not saved him, then he surely would have perished.

God’s work cannot remain concealed. God takes His people’s part, and Christ continues to pray for them. “For the man will not be in rest, until he have finished the thing this day.” Here, also, Peter must fall away, but God’s work shines forth in all the ways in which He leads His people.

The rest of the story tells us that Peter came to the sepulchre; that he went in, saw the clothes lie, and the napkin that was about His head, not lying with the linen clothes, but wrapped together in a place by itself.

If the Lord spares me, I hope at another time to write something about that, and also how this disciple who followed, has been found by Christ.

Let us now apply ourselves to that which has been considered. Peter was richly favored, and although in himself he was needy and poor, yet the Lord thought constantly on him. Christ did not thrust him from Him, but drew him towards Him and sweetly embraced him.

We always deceive ourselves, and that more and more, but the Lord knows that we have been transgressors from our youth. Yea, He knows what He may expect of His creatures. God loved His people freely, and He loves them unto the end.

But is is a personal matter. We can do nothing with Peter. We personally need the same grace. And let us bear in mind that it is not something which we ourselves can just take or can give ourselves. It is far from that. It is not something that we can imitate. We may also walk behind a child of God and follow him, but all that which we commence with ourselves, shall end in death. It must be God’s work within us, and from our side, that is an impossibility. The only hope is, “The things which are impossible with men, are possible with God.” We shall rush on whether in sin or in self-righteousness, but both shall terminate in eternal wretchedness.

Ah, that many might be brought to a stand-still and learn to make supplication to their Judge. Oh, that God might bare His arm and seize many that are drawn unto death, also from the rising generation, and that God might set some up as examples of His Almighty and all-conquering grace. What a different life it would bring into the Church and also in our families. The revealed will of God is, “Seek the Lord while He may be found; call upon Him while He is near.”

May God’s command become a prayer in our life, and if God grants us what He commands, then He shall not have commanded in vain. The service of God is a blessed service. Yea, then moments shall come in our life that we may sing with David,

“And in His service I delight.”

That is not our, but His service of love. The service of the Father, of the Son and of the Holy Spirit.

And, people of the Lord, may our life be a praying and thanking life before the Lord. We cannot preserve ourselves; we cannot stand upon our own feet.

The apostle Paul tells us with such emphasis, not he that stands, but “Let him that thinketh he standeth take heed, lest he fall.” May we not be highminded, but rather fear; fear for sin, fear for ourselves.

May the highness of God be ever bound upon our heart so that because of His highness, we might not sin but that we may live under the deep impression of the humiliation of Christ; what it has cost Him to satisfy God’s justice and to pay for the sins of His people. Ah, there lie so many snares and traps. The way in which we must walk is full of pits and holes. The Lord Jesus taught His disciples and all His people to pray, “Lead us not into temptation, but deliver us from evil.” Also, how often do we ourselves walk to meet the temptation. We trust ourselves too much. We often run so fast. Ah, that vain selfconfidence. Would that the Pharisee within us was dead, but he still lives too much in us. Two men went up into the temple to pray, the one a Pharisee and the other a Publican. Alas, we have much more of the Pharisee than of the Publican. And from thence come the sad experiences in or life. When Peter followed John, then he had the frame of the Publican. Yea, in such a frame we are not dangerous; then we do not do much wrong. A meek and a quiet spirit which is in the sight of God of great price. It shall be a surprise to those who can no longer run fast. Soon their sins shall be pardoned and their iniquities shall be removed, and they shall receive double for all their sins, and be restored in honor. Yea, one day they shall hear, “Friend, come up higher,” and in heaven there shall be no more sins. There they shall deny God and Christ no more; there no more shame shall cover their faces, but eternal joy shall be upon their head. Mourning and sighing shall then flee away forever.

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